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BP Mets Unfiltered: Mr. Met, a dildo, and the fake seriousness of baseball

I don’t blame Mr. Met for snapping. This season, which is somehow only two months old, has been draining, full of nightmares and suffering. Everyone is hurt and bad and sad. Nothing has gone right.

The kid inside the suit was fired for flipping off a fan. We got to forgot about a blowout loss to the Brewers. And the team put out the vaguest, yet most appropriate apology imaginable: “We apologize for the inappropriate action of this employee. We do not condone this type of behavior. We are dealing with this matter internally.”

In a season of missed curfews and skipped MRIs and truly dreadful baseball, the mascot’s middle finger got the most serious response. Kevin Plawecki’s dildo (or, rather, the dildo that just happened to be in Kevin Plawecki’s locker, as I’m sure he’d prefer I write) didn’t get an official statement. Mr. Met did. Mr. Met got fired.

And look, I get it; the team can’t have their mascot flipping off fans. As harmless and silly as it was, I get the firing. It’s easier to fire the nameless person in the costume than face accusations from angry parents about the inappropriate nature of a symbolic gesture. (I can’t believe I’m typing these words. I really can’t believe this is happening). He’ll reportedly keep his job with the organization, but won’t be allowed (forced?) to put on Mr. Met’s sweaty head ever again. Fine. Sometimes the optics win.

But that vague apology, the “inappropriate action” of the employee, says that Mr. Met’s middle finger is worse than anything else that’s happened at Citi Field this year. Bear with me here, but I think the team’s 23-28 record is more inappropriate. Matt Harvey’s 4.95 ERA and Jose Reyes’ .197/.271/.317 slash line are more inappropriate.

Let’s not pretend a mascot flipping off a fan is any more offensive than the product on the field.

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